My Story

In the last ten years my life has changed beyond all recognition.

Ten years ago, I was married to someone who constantly put me down:
I was too fat.
Too loud.
Too drunk (after 1 G&T on my birthday and it was the only day in the year I actually had a drink. And I was sober. He’d get drunk every Saturday, without exception).

I was working for an organisation where I didn’t feel valued – so much so when I left an away day on the Friday to attend a colleague’s funeral, my boss came up with a convoluted theory that I was having an affair and trying to get to a hotel room on work’s time – despite the fact there were other people from the business leaving the away day too, to attend the same funeral 🤦🏻‍♀️

I was desperately unhappy.

But nobody knew.

I was the queen of “look over there” and deflecting attention away from myself.

I did have my dog, Pablo. He kept me ‘sane’. Taking him for walks was my happy time. I felt on top of the world when it was just me and him.

Fast forward less than a year.

I left the organisation.

My husband told me I should be applying for minimum wage jobs, because it was all I was worth (ignoring my degree, post-grad, over a decade of experience since leaving uni) because nobody would ever pay me what I’d earnt before again.

I ended the marriage. Even my Dad (my only close relative) told me it was my fault – apparently I was unhappy because I hadn’t coked/cleaned enough and didn’t have kids. And he blamed the dog.

I started freelancing.

I didn’t know my worth

I just accepted fairly low paid roles – in line with what I’d been earning – because I had no idea what I brought to the table. And because I didn’t want to earn more than the ex-husband on the run-up to the divorce.

After the separation/divorce, everything started to change!

I adopted more dogs (I am a crazy dog lady – both the lady with the crazy dogs, and the crazy lady with the dogs – it works on many levels!)

I started feeling confident asking for more, because I started to understand that my clients were getting results as a result of working with me.

The more confident I felt, the better the results my clients were getting. And it became the most incredible self-perpetuating cycle!

Why am I telling you all of this?

Because it’s why I got into coaching.

I’ve become the coach I wish I’d met 10 years ago.

I get the self-doubt.
I get the labels we’ve taken on that other people gave us.
I get hiding and shrinking to make other people feel happier/more comfortable.

I also get it isn’t a permanent state.

My life is SO bloody different now.

If you’d have told me ten years ago that this would be my life in ten years, I would have laughed at you.

I also get that in a weird way, both my Dad and ex-husband were right.

• The marriage was my fault – because I’d allowed myself to be treated so poorly because I didn’t know how not to!
• And I never did earn that money again since the divorce. I’ve consistently earned more!

I want to help you get to this point too!

I know it’s scary.
I know you feel you don’t know what to do.
I know it feels like an insurmountable mountain to climb.

I also know you’ve got this. And I’d love to go on the journey with you!